Sometimes I Wish I Wasn’t Me

Why, you might be asking, would I say such a thing?
Before you start doling out reassurances about what a great & wonderful person I am (and don’t worry I know I am), let me explain.
Sometimes I wish I wasn’t me so I could see myself because I would laugh so hard.
And who couldn’t use a good laugh every now and then?
As soon as they start considering themselves adults most people regularly miss out on opportunities to laugh.

Earlier this week I was running my usual route through the city park with my dog. An older woman walking her little pug dog was going the opposite direction. She was probably close to seventy and looked fairly proper. You know the type, complete with slacks, a handbag, and coordinating shoes. I had a grandmother like that. She was lovely.
At any rate, as I was running past this woman my dog darted right in front of me. Apparently she decided on a last minute meet & greet with the pug.
I was totally unaware of these plans.
I tripped over my dog and bit it….it being the sidewalk.

Some profanity was ejaculated as I was hitting the pavement. I’m pretty sure it was just a shit & maybe a damn it. It might’ve been something stronger though.
If it was I’m a little embarrassed.
The older woman looked quite surprised.
I guess it’s not every day you see someone, an adult no less, fall right in front of you mid running stride.
She asked the appropriate questions of concern & I assured her I was fine…as blood dripped from my knee and I examined my broken sunglasses.
And we each continued on our way. She still looked a little baffled.
Personally I would’ve laughed. Yes, I know it’s rude but I would not have been able to help myself because…well, it’s not every day you see an adult fall, mid running stride, right in front of you.
And that is just funny.
But it’s funnier to see than it is to be.

image

Don't worry it looks worse than it is...it's just a scratch.

      

image

My new sunglasses, the real casualty of the day's run.

            

           

There was another, less painful, time I wished I wasn’t me this week. Only because the sheer hilarity of watching this situation unfold would have been great. Though I’m not sure if I would’ve laughed much harder than I did even if I had been watching this happen.

There’s a playground I take my kids to every so often. Since it just started being truly warm the past two weeks here in Michigan we haven’t been there in a while.
Both my daughter & I had to use the restroom so we left the playground and walked over to the two bathrooms. As I headed toward one of them I noticed a sign on the door that said “does not lock from the inside”.
That’s odd, I thought, why don’t the bathrooms lock anymore?
We walked up to one of the doors & I knocked pretty loudly. I didn’t want to walk in on anybody doing their business.
No answer.
I tentatively pushed the door open & poked my head in the small bathroom again wondering why the bathrooms don’t lock anymore.
The answer was waiting for me inside.
The city had updated to restroom & put a stall in.
I turned to tell my daughter this.
She was looking at me a bit sheepishly and said
“Mom, that’s the men’s bathroom.”

I looked at the door again and sure enough there above the locking sign was a much bigger sign that said MEN.
The guy who was walking over to use the restroom got a good laugh.
Actually so did I.
Still it would’ve been funnier to not be me at that moment but to be someone watching me instead.

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About nights7

A metamorphosis in progress...always.

One thought on “Sometimes I Wish I Wasn’t Me

  1. […] read our blog I’m not the one who usually falls. Usually, it’s my co-blogger as noted here, here and […]

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